Have you ever had that moment when the stars align, the tarot cards deliver and the lotto has your number? Or more importantly, that one moment where something you have heard YOUR ENTIRE LIFE finally sinks in?
Yeah. I had one of those just this week.
I was browsing the Kindle Deals in Amazon. While I don’t like reading books on my devices, now is not the time to be picky. I am out of new reading material; I don’t want to order a real book from Amazon and my library is not checking out new material.
Scroll. Scroll. Scroll. Stop.
My eyes flickered to a book by one of my favourite non-fiction, call it as it is authors – Brene Brown. I have a few of her greats already such as “Daring Greatly” and “Rising Strong.”
I scanned the title of the book and that is when I was hit with the “ah-ha” moment . . . or when a piece of logic finally got through the muddle in my mind and clicked.
The title was: “The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are.”
I read it again (so I encourage you to do the same.)
I wouldn’t say I am a perfectionist in all areas. I’m okay with the picture on the wall being crooked or if my sourdough bread comes out a little less sour and more bread. I’m okay when things fall short of my expectations or my grammar slips. My tag is showing on my shirt? No worries.
However, when it comes to ME personally . . . well, that’s where the illusion of calm, cool, and collected is shattered. I have this mental image of “having it together.” I want to be the helper and step in and save the world — or at least the tuna casserole. I want to appear like I know what to do and how to get it done.
News flash . . . I have never had anything together. I have an overactive imagination that feeds my anxious mind. I rarely know how to help and my social anxiety pretty much prevents me from stepping up to say hello — much less save the world.
Why do I do this to myself? Life would be so much easier if I let the hot mess in me run amok. I would be so much more authentic if the toddler that I keep a tight leash on in social situations was allowed free reign to ask awkward questions about people’s dating lives or if they floss before or after brushing. (Before, right?)
And I haven’t even read the book! I got this insight from a title. A title. My mother, sister, college roommate, and about three boyfriends all just went “Duh! I’ve been telling you that for ages.”
And they have.
But there comes a time when the stars align, the tarot cards are in order and I should buy a lottery ticket. There are moments when our mind grasps what it is we need in our lives.
Apparently, mine needs a bit more running amok and awkward interactions with strangers.
Or maybe, I’m finally ready to just be me.
Mental note to myself: Buy the book when stores open. Although the title was a pretty big wake-up call, there may be more insight in the actual pages.